Sex Positive Me

E100: The Ultimate Guide to Seduction & Foreplay Book

Listen to “E100: The Ultimate Guide to Seduction & Foreplay” on Spreaker.

We have the honor to chat with Jess O’Reilly & Marla Renee Stewart about their new book “The Ultimate Guide to Seduction & Foreplay” We discuss the reason for writing the book as well as the juicy contents in the book. Not only you learn how to seduce your partner sexually, but you will also learn that some of the information can be applied in a non-sexual way.

The book is written for anyone in any type of relationship. Solo, partner, vanilla, or kinky. There is something for everyone in the book. It can be an erotic book as some of the examples and stories really can get your juices flowing.

We love the fact that there are homework assignments, tips, and questions to ask your partner. Making you think outside of the box of seduction and foreplay. It is not always about being Nekkid and going straight to sex. There is no right or wrong way to define sex for you. Everyone has a different definition of it. Just need to clearly discuss it with your partner and what their definitions mean.

Enjoy the laughs, the science, and the discussion about Seduction & Foreplay!

Biography

Dr Jess O’Reilly – Jess O’Reilly (@SexWithDrJess) is a sex and relationship expert with a background in education. Her research and passion involves teacher training in sexual health and she volunteers in schools and universities to help bring better sex & relationship education to students across Ontario. Jess is also a television personality, author, podcast host (@SexWithDrJess Podcast), and international speaker who has facilitated hundreds of corporate workshops and retreats in 35 countries from Lebanon to Costa Rica.

Website: https://www.sexwithdrjess.com/
Facebook: JessicaOReilly
Instagram: sexwithdrjess
Twitter: @SexWithDrJess

Marla Stewart – Marla Renee Stewart, MA | Author | Speaker | Sexologist | Sex Educator | Sex Coach
Marla Renee Stewart, MA is a sexologist and a sex coach who runs her own sexuality education company, Velvet Lips. She is also a Co-Founder of the Sex Down South Conference and the Sexual Liberation Collective. She has studied human sexuality for more than 19 years and has been featured on a variety of media outlets, as well as spoken to various audiences around the world.

Website: https://www.velvetlipssexed.com/
Facebook: Marlarenee.Stewart
Instagram: 1marlastewart
Twitter: @1marlastewart



Amberly Rothfield
On sex positive me explore all aspects of sex and relationships ranging from fetishes and BDSM to ethical non monogamy and LGBTQ issues. sex positive media stigmatizes sexual practices and relationships while reconciling reality with myths and misconceptions. Our goal is to educate, entertain and be advocates of sexual freedom. And now here’s your host, Angelica and John Luna.

Angelique
Hi everyone. I’m Angelique Luna and I’m here with my co host partner in common quarantine and haven’t killed them yet or kill me yet. John C. Luna

John
We’re keeping our sanity, doing a lot of reading

Angelique
Lots of read. Yeah, I overdid it. I became over ambitious with reading and God kill myself and number one, I had to get the Ultimate Guide to seduction and foreplay because we do have today Jess O’Reilly and Marla Stewart to talk about their book Hello, ladies. Hello. Hi.

Marla Stewart
Thanks for having us.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Yeah, excited to be here.

Angelique
Yeah, so let me give you a little bit about their bio. Jess O’Reilly is a sex and relationship expert with a background in education. Her research and passion involves teacher training and sexual health and she volunteers in schools and universities to help bring better sex and relationship education to students across Ontario. Justice, also a television personality author, podcast, host and international speaker who has facilitated hundreds of corporate workshops and retreats in 35 countries from Lebanon to Costa Rica. We were in Costa Rica. And then we go to Marla, their Marla’s dude is like six colleges and sex coach who runs her own sexuality education company velvet lips. She’s also a co founder of the sex down South Conference and the sexual liberation collective. She has studied human sexuality for more than two 19 years and has been featured on a variety of media outlets as well as spoken to various audience around the world. And they’re more world renowned than we are. Yeah.

Love, love the book there. How did you ladies come up to collaborate together to do this book?

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Well, actually the so the publisher wanted to write a whole novel or whole book on seduction and foreplay and they have a they have a series called The Ultimate Guide series. So they came to us and when they called me first I said, Well, we can’t possibly write about seduction without Marla Renee Stewart because Marla is the originator and the person who came up with the theory around the seduction learning styles and I thought we knew that that would be more than a chapter in the book, but was in fact the framework for the book. So Marla, it was a perfect fit for Marla and I to collaborate.

Marla Stewart
Yes, yes, yes. And I was just I’m super super excited for her Jess to bring me on and just and the whole book is just absolutely amazing so but yeah, um Yeah, that’s it

Angelique
Oh yeah, beyond amazing there because I completely appreciate it that it was written very gender neutral, you don’t find that a lot of books there. So it was very specific there. And then also that it was open to, you know, to all lifestyle so it doesn’t matter if you’re in you know, cisgender monogamous relationship or kinky as you know. But yeah,

Marla Stewart
I think Yeah, I just think it was really important for us to make it gender neutral just because, you know, we really wanted to be we really wanted it to be accessible for a lot of people. And in order for that to happen, you know, we need to be you know, writing gender neutral, right, like okay, you know, if you have a vulva This is what things you can do with vulva as if you have a penis. These are the things that you can do with a penis and really understanding that you know, sex and sexuality can come from anywhere despite who you are so or in lieu of who you are so yeah, I was really excited about making sure that this was gender neutral and that we could always be accessible for for most people

Dr Jess O’Reilly
yeah, I’m sure we still have something to learn because we’re always learning but uh, I think to the the book is relevant to people who are in monogamous relationships or non monogamous relationships or not in relationships or you know, relationship and our kids maybe even maybe that’s where where we draw the line. Maybe they’d be like, this is too much structure.

Angelique
You know, for us is really important. Yeah. For us being relationship our neck is not really I like the structure. I love how you frame up all the questions and tips and tricks and you know, kind of like the Spanish Inquisition to

Marla Stewart
The homework is necessary like I was like we have to have a homework we got a we’ve got to make sure that they you know, have these exercises because, you know, that’s really a way to just keep thinking about it. You know, when you’re whenever you’re, you know, you’re into a subject and you really, you know, we read it once. And sometimes it’s just sort of, you know, in your head and out of your head but when you actually do do the homework, sit down and take the time to write it out. You really can you know, foster some of that, that energy and intelligence and put it to work in your sex life.

John
Very cool. What I like about it was i’ve i’ve read these books throughout the years to say seduction, and usually they come to a chapter or the whole book is on dirty talk or something to that. effect. And I noticed it is a small section in here. But I love how you even one of my favorite chapters is erotic sizing daily interactions. It doesn’t make it this, hey, this is that, you know, Australian vacation you get once a year, so make it count. It’s we can do this every day and make it sustainable. Exactly.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Yeah. I mean, if people want to overhaul their lives, they certainly can. But you know, 99.9% of us don’t have the bandwidth to overhaul every way we think every way we behave every way we interact every way we speak and dirty talk certainly is a part of it. But as Marlo really outlines with the seduction learning styles, dirty talk might be more effective for audio learners and maybe a little less effective for people who are more kinesthetic. And I think that’s, that’s an important piece to not assume that what one person wants another person wants and that’s what we wanted to reframe, with this book to acknowledge that sex means different things to different people and seduction. isn’t a precursor to sex seduction is sex seduction and foreplay can overlap, they can blend into something that’s really seamless. And seduction, of course, has been a little bit bastardized by pickup culture, right? It’s been really framed as manipulative and tactics aimed at pressuring or swindling instead of a version of seduction, that that involves consent and mutual desire and not about getting what you want, but giving and receiving and all sorts of pleasure. And I think that Marla, you really helped me to stay on track with making sure that the way we speak about sex and interactions and relationships is is is more inclusive.

Marla Stewart
Yes, thank you. Thank you. And I really to the point of like, even thinking about those eroticized those daily interactions, I really love the chapter about like seduction for busy people too. Right? So thinking about like, not only our daily interactions, but how if we’re, you know, we get so busy in our area. everyday life, what are the things that we can do on an everyday basis, whether we’re far away from our lovers or not to ensure that we’re always going to have a good time or we’re always in a way, we’re always, you know, seducing or, or being able to, you know, eroticized our sexuality and, you know, in various ways. Yeah,

Angelique
yeah. And especially in that section, the seduction for busy people. I love the fact that you put mindfulness in there, you know, to really work on your breath and slowing down and paying attention to your partner during how busy you get because yeah, we really just get into that. Go, go, go Go and don’t forget to slow down or schedule sets.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Yeah, it’s true. We we tend to move through life mindlessly. And of course, there’s no magic pill. But if there was one thing, one approach that I think doctors, therapist, people who are just doing it for themselves if there’s one approach that could address so many of the sexual challenges As we run into besides eradicating gender, but we would really be mindful sex mindful approaches to life right, so that you are really enjoying pleasure in our culture we, we stifle expressions of pleasure, right? We have to eat silently chew silently Keep your mouth shut. Don’t let out your oohs and ahhs. And so we think about an area that is not nearly as stigmatized as sex. Of course, eating is easier for some people than other i think that you know, if you’re a skinny person, you have more permission to enjoy food. Whereas if you have a larger body, you’re more in trouble and more judged, but overall food doesn’t carry generally the same universal shame as sex and we’re not even allowed to you know, just let out a big when something tastes delicious, and that’s a great place to start with mindfulness, right is to eat mindfully. Now I’ve heard about mindful eating and I hate that it’s it has been bastardized for weight loss right to your food 40 times so that you don’t want so much I’m like, Oh, damn, man, when I’m hungry. I mean, something delicious. Yes, I want to like slow down enjoy it, but I don’t need 40 chews for for a spoonful of chocolate mousse. So you know, it’s about not just being mindful but but giving ourselves permission to enjoy all types of pleasure.

Angelique
Yeah, we actually decided to do a five day pleasure roadmap challenge to help people understand that pleasure is not shameful. So it’s having them explain what favorite book movies, food, body parts, songs that makes them feel joy, giving them permission to, like, feel like excited because yeah, you’re right. We, as a society, we do not give ourselves permission to enjoy pleasure. Like, I always have to look at people cross eyed in stupid when there’s that, oh my god, it’s hard to have it like a guilty pleasure to have carbs because you’re going through a carb free diet. It’s like, Ah,

John
well, it’s more than that. In this society. It’s even like, Oh, I went for a massage, but I had a rough week. There’s no reason to have any excuse for pleasure. You’re a full grown adult. Enjoy it.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
That’s a great point. That’s a good reminder.

Marla Stewart
Yeah, I agreed. I’m like, Yes, enjoy yourself, please enjoy yourself.

That’s all we can. That’s all we need. That’s all we can do. But you know, we should be able to enjoy ourselves as freely as we want, without harming without harming anybody else, of course.

John
Well, I also love the fact that your examples were very specific. I know my wife’s favorite is when we talk about the belly button. She claims that is her territory.

Angelique
Is my territory there. It’s like no one else. It’s like, we’re in an open relationship he could play but that’s the one area nobody else could touch and he doesn’t find it erotic or anything, but I do it that’s just like my property there.

John
But I’ve read a few different books on seduction, and I really do like yours. I read one called the art of seduction. And I tell people, don’t buy it. Because it was like 500 pages, unless you’re a really great French history enthusiast. Don’t, because it just goes on forever. Um, you guys really did get to the point. And I love the specifics of what you’re doing not some thing that happened hundreds of years ago.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Yeah, we know we’re trying to provide the theory but also the action. That’s why you know, the book is full of, I think hundreds of prompts to get you thinking, writing, talking, changing the way you think, if you want to and changing your behavior, and then and revisiting, like, I look at it, and I think, okay, nobody’s going to do all of these things. We get that, right. But if you did three or four of them, I think you’re on a really good path because most people don’t invest in their relationships. Most people don’t plan for their relationships, like we say things like, will you marry me? It’s like, what the hell does that mean, right? Instead of asking the questions like What does long term commitment look like to you? Where do you want To be when you’re 70 8090 years old, you know, how does your family integrate into your life? All of those questions matter and may go that may not sound like seduction. That might sound rather, you know, related but not specifically tied to it, but it all is because if you want to be in the mindset to be seduced, you also have to be on the same page relationally

Marla Stewart
Yeah, definitely. And thinking about what you’re talking about, like the art of seduction, and thinking about that book. I love that book just because I love like the history of it all. And at the same time, I’m like, okay, people can fit into these archetypes but it is very lengthy. And I think like, like just said, this book just has like lots of different prompts. Lots of questions you should be asking yourself and your lover about, you know, all the different aspects of sexuality and, and this is just one piece, right? This is only, you know, seduction and foreplay and you know, some strategies He’s around sex so i can i can imagine that thinking about you know, anything else around sexuality is going to be even deeper but I think this the these exercises in general help you to dive a little deeper into your awareness around sex about sex and sexuality.

Angelique
I also think it dives into more the psychology of how to seduce even people non sexually. And that’s what I like about it because it’s like you’re getting what you want, but they’re also getting something the way you do it because people often just think seduction is just sexual and don’t think about it’s like, how do I seduce my employer to get a better job? How do I seduce this, you know, clients so I can get I don’t know the end product because we do have in our class, but this book like really gives you like, here’s the roadmap, here’s what you need to do.

Marla Stewart
Yeah, and it’s like one of the things like seeing When I tell people is like a great seducer sees everything as their bedroom, you know, so called like in quotes, right? Like so regardless if it’s your, you know, if it’s your coworker or boss or children or family members whomever, like it is the, it’s what you’re doing that is its give or take relationship, right? It’s the influence you have because of what you are giving to them and providing for them for that sort of even exchange of of

Even exchange of of, you know, I guess, energy. Yeah, energy opportunity. Yeah.

Angelique
I know, there’s so much that you can exchange with that. So, yeah.

John
Should we do just a little commercial break?

Angelique
Yeah. We’ll do a little commercial breaks and get our sponsor some attention.

John
All right. We’ll be right back. Hey, john,

Angelique
I want to get a new toy.

John
Okay, so let’s go to fair villa.

Angelique
But I don’t want to waste time. I’m trying to find out what goes with what?

John
Well, there’s Fairfield University and their staff is very well educated and helpful.

Angelique
Okay, but how about if I just wanted a job party instead?

John
Then go to their website because on their calendar, they list all their events.

Angelique
But I don’t want to spend a lot of money.

John
Have you heard of that loyalty program?

Angelique
Oh, yeah, the thing. I’m like a chain that makes everyone blush every time they see it. That’s the one. Let’s go.

John
Well, they have over five locations in Central Florida. Which one do you want to go to?

Angelique
Fairvilla, for pleasure, fun and fantasy.

Marla Stewart
Jess I think you should talk about the core erotic style. The core erotic feeling.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Yeah. To me. Emotional seduction is personally the most interesting. And I also find that people are really responsive to it because we tend to either assume that sex is universally a loving, caring what we call intimate experience. Or we assume that sex is void of emotion that it’s a carnal act. And the reality is that most of us exist in the gray area somewhere or I shouldn’t even call it gray area that we exist on this world wide web of emotional attachments to sex. And so one of the most important concepts that we really wanted to delve into in the book is your core erotic feeling, as well as your elevated erotic feeling. So your core erotic feeling refers to the emotion that you require, in order to get in the mood for sex. If I don’t feel this particular emotion, sex is off the table. Now it doesn’t mean that every time you feel that feeling that you’re going to be in the mood for sex, but in the absence of that feeling, sex is not going to happen and everybody’s core erotic feeling is different. You might need to feel relaxed or loved or honored or happy or safe or powerful or playful or stress free or sexy or desired or full of energy or vulnerable. I mean, the obviously emotion are unlimited here. And so there are common core erotic feelings. Like for example, a lot of straight women will say in long term relationships, they want to feel really, really wanted. They want to feel like you want them, you don’t just want sex. And of course there that’s just one example I can tell you my partner, for example, Brandon needs to feel relaxed, like he just needs to be de stressed in order to get in the mood for sex. So we kind of walk you through what your core erotic feeling is. Give you some prompts to try and figure out what your core erotic feelings are is because it’s not, you know, a simple test and it pops out a specific answer for you. And then we talk about how to cultivate your core erotic feeling because we have this tendency to believe that I need to feel this way. So I need to teach my partner or partners to make me feel this way when in fact, your feelings are primarily your own responsibility. So if you say oh, I need to feel really sexy in order to get in the mood for sex. It’s not your partner’s job. Yes, they play a role. You can teach them and we talk about how to kind of show them what that means. Because saying I need to feel sexy, you know, means one thing to one person and another to to somebody different. So we walk you through your core erotic feelings so that you can really understand the emotional underpinnings of seduction. It’s not just about dirty talk, it’s not just about the way you approach them. It’s not about just about your body language or the way you touch or the way you kiss, or the chemistry it really is about an emotional connection. And that that emotion could be any emotion at all. And then once you figured out your core erotic feeling, or if you feel that the erotic feeling is a little bit irrelevant to you, that’s when we move on to what makes sex the most powerful, the most memorable, the most exciting, and that’s those are your elevated rock, erotic feelings and your elevated erotic feelings are the emotions that take sex to the next level. And that’s why you know, we can get turned on by I think Marla, you’ve talked a little bit about being adored. And I’ve talked about you know, I like to I get turned on by feeling jealous now Jealousy is not my core erotic feeling. I don’t want to walk around feeling jealous, but in the context of a relationship in which I feel very secure and honored, then Damn, it’s exciting to feel some of those obsessive versiv emotions like a little bit threatened. There’s another one with how would I describe it? I like to feel inadequate. I like that feeling. Do I want to feel inadequate in my relationship? No, absolutely not. But once you understand your core erotic feeling, and it is so securely attended to, that’s when you can really launch off the charts in and explore this more Uncharted, terror, unchartered territory.

Angelique
And I love the fact that you actually have exercises for people to really go through their core erotic feelings and process it and write it out. Because a lot of times we wouldn’t know how to express it. You know, emotional intelligence is one thing but core erotic feelings. It’s another like why processes

John
I can totally relate to Brandon in that I need to feel relaxed, and I know this Like certain moods I need to be in. And the truth is I learned this to other relationships. For example, you you love excitement, like,

Angelique
I’m an adrenaline junkie.

John
On a roller coaster or throw you want to hook up a sports car and you’re in there.

Angelique
We were at a swingers club. This is like we’re dating a couple of weeks and I’m an exhibitionist. So I like to be in the middle of the room happy, you know, sex with my partner, and he’s freaking out here having an anxiety attack. He’s like, I can’t do this. I’m like, whoa, wait a minute. You’re with me. So guess what? Yes, you’re going to do it.

John
10 years later, we’re still together. So

Marla Stewart
Sometimes people need a little bit of a push sometimes, you know, and to get out of your comfort zone. I think, for a lot of people, they, you know, they stay in their comfort zone, stay in their comfort zone and then they get bored, right. And then that’s a problem. You know, well, it is To get it you get to be a problem if you’re doing the same things over and over again. So I think it’s always fun to get out, push yourself to really get uncomfortable and do things that you wouldn’t normally necessarily think about doing. And see where that takes you. And I always tell people, you know, there’s, you know, try it three times, you know, first time you might be a little iffy. Second time, you know, you don’t know if it’s you the partner without third time If you still don’t like it, then you know, just just be done with it, come back to it and 10 years, I say, you know, because our bodies change, we change you know, things change. So, but yeah, always, always push yourself to do something different. So that’s good. I’m glad to do something new.

Angelique
Yeah, and that actually falls into like the sevens that that shoots of seduction, which I was caught off guard with three of them because the other ones we have like okay, build anticipation. So curiosity less, be more Be present and mindful. But what threw me off was, don’t take everything personally embrace the rejection so you can expand your comfort zone and take risks. And however learning to manage rejection for makes for more fulfilling relationships and try to avoid rejection altogether. I was like, Whoa, those blew my mind there as being part of seduction.

Marla Stewart
Yeah, I mean, when you embrace. So when it comes to rejection, I think it’s very important to think about, like, you know, being clear, being considerate, but also being uncomfortable, right, like rejection is a part of life. We all get rejected for something some, you know, somewhere, but it’s always a learning opportunity. It’s always a way to find out more about yourself. And I think, you know, understanding what your what your lover likes or doesn’t like, and you know, it’s okay, right. There are so many things. I want to do that Esther’s like I’m not doing that, right? Now the feeling. And then there’s some things that I’m actually when I push where when I say something like, she’ll be like, oh, I’ll try that. And it’s just like, shocking, right? So I think there’s a, you know, there’s a way of introducing something or there’s a way of embracing like, hey, somebody might or might not like, whatever it is that you’re that you like, and that’s okay. Right, it can be a learning opportunity. So,

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Yeah, absolutely. And it’s not exciting if there’s no fear of rejection, right, like part of what makes many types of sex and sexual encounters exciting is that there is the possibility that something could go wrong, right. And we all have different degrees of tolerance for risk. But, you know, if you’re afraid of rejection, I mean, a very simple thing that you’ll you know, therapists will tell you about is that you you never initiate sex right? If you have too much If you’re rejection, you task your partner with initiating sex almost 100% of the time and we know the cost of that. in long term relationships. If only one person is tasked with initiating sex, eventually they grow frustrated. They’re the only ones dealing with rejection and it becomes cyclical where they stop trying

John
You get into ruts, most definitely. Pushing boundaries is definitely something we’ve definitely done. Quite a bit of, especially in the BDSM world, but I think I heard a long time ago was Everyone has their hell yeses, their maybes, and they’re held up so soft limits and hard limits. But the truth is, it’ll become desensitized over time and even more secure in our relationship. Everything takes a little shift. And those maybes become healthy as and a lot of those hell knows kind of become maybes, and it’s good. We go ahead and explore new things because it keeps it exciting, especially for long term relationships.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Absolutely. And even some of those hell yes. can become knows, right like, and that’s okay too like things that I was into two years ago. It’s not that I’m adverse to them, I’m just not into them now. And that’s, to me, that’s the only way you can stay in a long term relationship is if you’re changing, like I would be so bored. If a partner or partners wanted the exact same thing. Five months from now, five years from now, 50 years from now, of course, some things are going to remain, you know, sematic or constant, but we need the change for excitement.

Marla Stewart
Yeah, and I think it’s also important to I think what you mentioned was really an element of safety. Right? And so you’re talking about those those maybes becoming hell yeses, or those nose becoming maybes. I think it’s because you’ve developed a way of being safe. you’ve developed a relationship or a foundation that feels good, and where you can where you’re, you’re allowing yourself to explore that with you know, with your lovers.

Angelique
So, any Thoughts about putting a lot of these exercises in little flashcards because I could see that happening because I’m like, Oh, yeah, let’s do this. I know you suggest creating them. I’m just thinking maybe as a supplement. Just, I love it.

Marla Stewart
You’re totally like, we’re gonna do a workbook or something. We’re on it, we’re on it.

John
Well, I get the feeling this collaboration between the two, given the result is not going to be the first. Well, it’s the first not gonna be the last sorry.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
I hope not. I hope not. No,

Marla Stewart
no. Yeah, definitely. Already. I’ve already recruited Jess for another project. I’m like, No, no, no, we have to do something. You know, when this book came out, I was just so jazzed about it. And of course, you know, as an entrepreneur, you’re like, oh, then I have this idea. That idea and this idea and this idea, and I was like, Okay, I have already had this one idea. And now I’m like this, I’ve got another idea and I’ve got to go for it. So

Angelique
What’s the next idea? Or is it a

Marla Stewart
relationship book? Or? Yes, yes.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
I don’t know. You have a lot of ideas.

Angelique
I know. I know it’s trying to keep up with her sometimes I’m like, What the hell we did? Which one is that? What email? Am I reading? mindfulness spirituality. I get it again. I’m trying to be better at it.

John
So this book is on sale. Now. I’m assuming they can get it anywhere books are sold. Any works in there for an audiobook?

Angelique
Yeah, I need the audio book to tell you the truth.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Oh, we should do that Mr. That we were talking about that we have to get on it. You know what, because this was released during isolation. All of you know many of the plans fell through like for all the different speaking, speaking and signing offs. And so we’re going to be doing a virtual launch very soon. And yeah, the audio book should should follow shortly thereafter.

John
Very cool. Really. Looking forward to it. So the full name is the ultimate guide to seduction, foreplay techniques and strategies for mind blowing sex. So

Angelique
what else are you ladies up to? I know we’re in quarantine right now. And thankfully, sex down south will still happen in September. It’s like, if not John’s heart will be broken because he’s presenting sounding of all things. Like Okay, I will be somewhere else. I don’t know which room but not his class. That’s

John
a great example of well, you couldn’t quite try it. But you at least watched it, watched it and then said no, not for me. You know. Exactly. And that’s a very important thing is to have that a non judgmental zone where I can have that without any judgement for me.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
JOHN, what is your What is your presentation at sex down south called

John
An introduction to sounding

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Oh, interesting grades

John
We’ll go over the safety of it the little history of it in the first half you kind of get everyone an idea of making sure they’re in the right place and in the right room and then hopefully do a little demo at the end.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Oh awesome. I’m gonna be there to sex down sex down south is not my project so I’m gonna plug it September 10 to 12th in Atlanta and it is I mean I you probably think sex conferences are all exciting if you’re not used to going to them but this one really is really among the best the best I’ve been to for sure really, really loved it so yeah, hopefully we’ll see some some of y’all there.

Marla Stewart
Yes, yes. For

Angelique
our fourth year Yep. Going It is very addicting honestly from the energy the people the shows the entertainment actually was referring one of my psychic friends I’m like, Hey, you gotta go to this conference because your you and your boo would like this.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
And then did they say I already knew that?

Haha. No, they did. It.

Angelique
A lot of people that we always keep telling them you actually interviewed a cannabis Faker. And we even encouraged her. It’s like, hey, go just submit it. It’ll be the great thing. And luckily Thank you Marla, you accepted her and she’s presented and she’s over the moon. So yeah.

Marla Stewart
Oh, awesome. Yeah, it’s so it’s still it was a we tried to curate it a little bit more this year, but we definitely voted on a lot. So we had room for more speakers this year. So So yeah, all all the team.

John
One of the more unknown facts about sex down south is it usually occurs the week after Dragon Con. Yes. The entire town is ready to just wind down and relax. And everyone working there is just so happy to have us.

Marla Stewart
Dragon Con is huge. And yeah, and it’s at the same hotel so it can really be a lot for them. So we’re definitely low maintenance especially because we’re like, leave us alone. Let us do our own sexy stuff over here. And so the hotel staff is actually really super, super sweet and nice to us.

John
So do you ladies want to say where you can be found because I know people gonna be looking for this book.

Marla Stewart
Yeah, definitely. And if you want to get an autographed copy you can find it on my website velvet lips sex ed calm. And you can find me on social media at one of Marla Stewart or velvet lips sex ed that sex without the E and you can find me on YouTube. I write on medium and you can also support the Patreon if you want Bobby lipstick said

Dr Jess O’Reilly
awesome. Yeah, and I’m not selling the book. So you’re gonna go to velvet lip sex ed. And my website is sex with Dr. Just calm my video courses. I do have a course on mindful sex. That’s a kind of a 12 part course that I think is really impactful. It’s that happier couples calm. And I have a podcast as well the sex with Dr. Jess podcast and we I know who actually you guys have been on the podcast we were talking about bisexuality and the lifestyle. Marla of course has been on the podcast. Although Marla, you need to come back. We need more of you.

Marla Stewart
I know.

Dr Jess O’Reilly
Awesome,

John
very cool. Well, thank you very much for coming. We appreciate you taking the time out of this very strange at home and hanging with us.

Marla Stewart
Thank you. Thank you for having us. I appreciate it.

Angelique
Thank you so much. And don’t forget to like subscribe and review our podcast because we want to get things going and moving and also join the challenge the five day pleasure roadmap challenge to get you thinking off of the shame free because afterwards we’re doing a shame free workshop grading, but let’s a call creating a shame free environment. So good. You thinking and comfortable about leisure without shrink? Oh, thanks everyone. Have a good one. Bye

Liked it? Take a second to support Sex Positive Me on Patreon!